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Clingy Girlfriend Or Wife? 13 Signs of an Unhealthy Or Codependent Relationship

The image of the demanding woman being in control of the relationship is one that is popular and sometimes even comical in TV in film. Just look at the popular American sitcom Everyone Loves Raymond: Ramyond is always at risk of getting into trouble with his wife. However, sometimes being stuck in a relationship with a dramatic, demanding, clingy woman can be anything but funny.

The following signs indicate that you may be in an unhealthy codependent relationship with your partner:

* You must let her know where you are at all times
* You have to call multiple times a day
* You aren't allowed to have platonic female friends
* She resents your family for taking up your time
* You've discovered that she secretly checks your email, internet history, or social networking sites (Facebook, MySpace, etc.).
* She is extremely jealous
* She can't just let things go -- she insists on talking about "problems" for hours
* She always suspects you of cheating or doing something wrong, even if you've done nothing
* She's overly critical of how you act
* You feel as if you have to "walk on eggshells" around her
* Your friends warn you that you should not be tolerating her clingy, controlling behavior
* You can't speak your opinion because she always "freaks out" when you disagree
* When you try to break up, she threatens to harm herself

When you feel stuck in such a relationship, you might have opposing feelings: On one hand you love your partner and want to please her; on the other hand, you may have a nagging sense that you never wanted this life. You may feel that your partner stands in the way of you living a fulfilling life.

It's your obligation to closely examine your situation. Many people wish to leave their partners because they blame them for everything; when they finally leave, they realize that it wasn't only their partner that was causing the disruption, but their own issues as well.

That said, many men would be much better off by gathering the courage to leave a clingy, demanding, codependent partner (by the way, codependence always involves two people, but here I'm using it to describe a woman who is overly dependent on her man). Though leaving may seem impossible at times, you can do it, regardless of your circumstances.

If you're a man or woman who could use help leaving an unhappy relationship, see the links in the box below.

Michael Freeman, M.A., helps women and men get FREEDOM from unhappy relationships.
Break Up Help for Women
Break Up Help for Men

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